Hello! Just wanted to share my experience with weightloss and dating, hopefully get some advice from someone that has gone through sometimes similar.
Some backstory Im a male, 32 years old and 191cm tall (6ft3). Over the course of 1.5 years Ive lost about 29kg (64lbs). Went from 117kg to 88kg(194lbs). Currently content with my weight, but om working on losing some more, slowly. Before losing weight i always felt really ugly, discusting and unwanted. I never got any attention from the opposite sex. Yes, large part because of my confidence. But at the time it felt like someone being attracted to me was impossible.
Dating Been using dating apps since mid september last year. Currently sitting on 60 matches. Most conversations fizzle out. I've gone on dates with 5 different women, one of them I rejected after the first date because i didnt feel anything romantic. The other 4 we went on 3 dates each. So a total of 13 dates. We talk, we laugh, we have fun. I give compliments. Nothing sexual happened, just hugging and holding hands. Which i initiate. Somehow it always ends with them telling me they just want to be friends. Which i of course accept. It just hurts, especially my last interest. We texted everyday (20-30 messages) for 2 months. We would even talk on the phone for 2-5 hours a couple of times a week.
Im just exhausted, i spend so much energy trying to get a connection. Just when i get hopefully and start to feel something, its suddenly over. And it is VERY sudden. The though of doing it all over again just sucks. Ive never had a long term partner before, only a few one night stands from drinking hookups. Its not their fault, i realise im the problem. I just dont know what to do. Im fit, i feel like i look good. I just dont know how to interact and take it further because im so used to feeling unwanted and unattractive.
Sorry for the long post, just looking for some advice because im hurting right now, and i feel a bit lost. A large motivator for my weightloss was to find love, but its just so draining.
Has anyone experienced something similar?
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/1q855px/dating_after_weightloss_any_advice_feeling_lost/
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