I (22M) had been lifting and partially keeping up with my diet for a couple years (from when I was ~19 to ~21), but I eventually fell off with it since I couldn't get myself to enjoy lifting and I was really busy with schoolwork. I've been considering getting back into it, but I was still uncertain.
I checked my testosterone levels a while back, and they were on the lower end of average. I have gynecomastia, I grew up on the chubbier side, I’m only 5’9”, and I have long femurs (and a short torso), relatively high calf insertions, and bicep gaps, all of which didn’t seem like very good signs regarding genetics. For one thing, I was having trouble with my squat form when I was trying to improve it back when I was still going to the gym, just to still have issues with it. I thought I made progress with my calves when comparing with progress pictures about 5-6 months apart, just for them to be the same measurements.
I also felt like the ship already sailed when it comes to getting in shape since almost all of the guys online started in grade school or grew up playing sports (which I didn’t). And I'm not actively trying to find excuses to get out of trying to get in shape - I’ve had self-esteem issues in most parts of my life, and didn’t think I'd feel great if I spent years lifting (which I could barely get myself to enjoy) just to still feel poorly about myself compared to other men because of things I could never change about myself, such as those I mentioned. I know there are other benefits like health, discipline etc. but I guess I had a bit of a nihilistic viewpoint on that in a way, where it felt like I'd still feel poorly about myself regardless of how healthy I am physically. I suspect like it's likely an inner mental issue beyond the gym I should work to resolve, but I tried therapy before, it didn't get anywhere, and I'm honestly convinced that I inherently can't develop a good mindset. I was wondering if I could get any advice on what to do.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/1pepfju/what_do_i_do_if_i_want_to_get_back_into_lifting/
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