I’ve posted before, both here and in other subs. I’m 7 months postpartum and I weigh more right now than I did after giving birth. I’ve gained about 30 lbs since having my twins in February, on top of the pregnancy weight I gained. I have completely lost any semblance of self control to stick to any sort of diet or plan.
A few years ago, I lost 130 lbs. I’ve gained almost every pound back. I love being a mom and having my babies, but I’m terrified for our future. They’re getting more mobile and I get out of breath just walking around the house, moving from room to room. My relationship with my husband is suffering because I don’t want him to see what I look like. Nothing fits. I have a closet full of clothes of various sizes and all of them are right. I hate having to wear anything other than pajamas. My own freaking wedding ring is too tight. I’m laying in bed right now with a stomach ache from the junk I’ve eaten today.
I want to say tomorrow is the day I will wake up and take control of my overeating and sugar addiction, but I don’t even believe it. I have no idea what to do. I don’t have the willpower to fast. I absolutely will not cook, not even to meal prep. I tried. I don’t have the time and I end up wasting the food. I have a crippling Starbucks coffee addiction. Everyday, sometimes twice. I don’t know how to stop that, either.
We’re going grocery shopping tomorrow. I’m going to buy low-cal, high protein stuff like the canned chicken and try to just live off chicken salad sandwiches for the week, but I don’t know. I don’t believe in myself. My husband deserves better. My babies deserve better. I’m going to cry myself to sleep now. If you read this, thank you.
[link] [comments]
from loseit - Lose the Fat https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/1frxjz8/im_at_my_breaking_point_i_hate_myself/
Comments
Post a Comment