Well here we go again. I recently saw a picture of myself from my Onederland era and am working to get back to that. I had really great success with CICO 2018-2019 and lost 58 lbs. F26 5’4” SW: 245 lbs CW: 222 lbs I started August of 2018. April 2019, I got to my lowest of 187 lbs. Life happened- I moved to Idaho, went back to school, and just gave up. Stepping on the scale was terrifying, but it was great to see I haven’t gained it all back. I started again on Wednesday, the day before Thanksgiving. I figure if I can get through the holidays, I’ll re-train myself to push through the rest of the year. If I can see results before the end of the year, I won’t be starting from scratch on a New Year’s Resolution.
Potential Roadblocks: 1. I started working at Starbucks so I am surrounded by free sugary drinks. One of my “rules” in 2018 was that I was not “drinking my calories.” I’ve gotten used to grabbing a drink at the beginning of my shift, and another drink to sip on throughout the day. I will need the discipline to control my impulses, deal with the stress of work without sugar, choose my drinks wisely, and pick either- before work or after work. 2. I moved back in with my parents. My mom has been on her own journey. She struggled with her weight and fad dieting my entire childhood. Years ago, she joined a 12 step program similar to OA. Her restrictions were no sugar and no flour. She kept this up for years and lost over 100 lbs. Clearly those kinds of restrictions are not sustainable and she has not kept it up. She now shames herself for eating sugar and flour. She looks great but always talks about how she needs to get back. I got my emotional late night binges from her. Often, we will be in the kitchen whipping up a late night snack. I don’t want my own journey to push her back to her old restrictions- they are so unhealthy mentally and not sustainable. I never want my mom to miss out on another birthday cake because she thinks she can’t control “letting the beast out of the cage.” I’d love if she started CICO with me and we can budget for birthday cake together. 3. Clearly I never got to the “why” I overeat and turn to food when my emotions are difficult to handle. I’m in therapy and hoping I can continue to dig into this. If it’s not food, it’s alcohol, weed, or hyper-sexuality. I cannot continue to redirect my unhealthy coping mechanisms. I really need to find healthier ways to manage my stress, anxiety, and depression.
I’m making this post to hold myself accountable. I’m putting it out there and I’m really doing this again. I’m going to learn from my mistakes. I cannot take a break from logging in MFP. If it’s getting too difficult to keep up, I need to reassess my daily goals and adjust as needed. I need to find those healthy coping skills and hobbies.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/r3ik6r/here_we_go_again/
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