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No willpower

Sorry for formatting as I’m on mobile. I honestly don’t know what to do anymore y’all. I’m 5’4, 273lbs and I have absolutely no willpower. I have tried for years to lose weight and eat healthy an I just can’t stick with it. It’s not that I don’t like healthy food, it’s that I’m so picky that I have to WANT what I’m eating. If I don’t, I feel sick trying to force it. I also am picky about a lot of foods and I don’t like to constantly eat the same thing over and over again. Repetition actually bothers me. I also have tried doing meal prep, but for some reason reheating food makes it taste wrong to me.

I have tried so many diets. I’ve tried fad diets, crash diets, and even just regular healthy eating. I just can’t seem to stick with it. I should mention that I have severe anxiety and depression (maybe ADHD but never been diagnosed. I just know I have a lot of symptoms of it). I have cried over my lack of willpower so many times. It’s not for lack of wanting to lose weight. It’s legit all consuming for my thoughts. I just have an issue sticking with it.

I am a disabled veteran and I have gone through the VA to try and get some actual help and they are having me do a program. It’s 16 modules and while I think it’s a great program, I don’t think it’s something that’ll work for me. However to even consider any other options, I have to go through this program. My problem is I am now having anxiety attacks just thinking about the fact that I’m not able to stick with this and going in to weigh in. I legit want to vomit just thinking about it. I’ve heard from other people in comments that they did a pharmaceutical option and I have no idea how to go about asking for this. I have such bad anxiety that discussing anything with my dietician makes me uncomfortable. She’ll just sit there after I finish talking. While I know it’s a tactic to get you to talk more to fill the silence, I just felt judged.

All this might sound like excuses to some, but for me this is the most frustrating thing. I want to lose weight so badly so I can feel confident and feel like myself again, but I have no willpower to stick with it. I just don’t know what to do.

submitted by /u/ahawk300
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/pxojdi/no_willpower/

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