TW: ED
I've tried to lose weight several times and it usually ended up triggering my disordered eating - I would slip right back into skipping lunch, eating small amounts of shitty food or throwing up, much like I used to in high school.
Now last time I tried, I actually took a pretty healthy route, eating well, keeping track of nutrients, making sure I actually feel full even when in a calorie deficit. But my mental health still decreased. The constant restriction and thinking about food made me extremely cranky, I was always angry and/or anxious and wasn't really enjoying life much, so I eventually quit.
Having to obsess over what I eat while I see people enjoying themselves without restriction just drives me crazy. It eventually starts to feel like I have to think about food all the time, I cannot really be spontaneous about eating/drinking and nothing is fun anymore. I guess my mental health is so tied in with food issues (always has been) that the two things will always affect each other.
Has anyone been through this? Do you have some tips or experiences that might give me hope?
(For clarity, I have been in therapy for a long time, I do take care of my mental health, but it's still hard. Also, I was never formally diagnosed with an ED as it didn't go far enough for someone to notice, I was just lost and this was how I coped as a teen, like many other girls unfortunately)
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/1newzzu/i_want_to_lose_weight_but_it_takes_a_toll_on_my/
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