My Mom Gained Over 145 lbs in 4 Years Since She Started Dating Again

I’m struggling to process how much my mom has changed in the past few years. After my dad passed away, she eventually started dating again, which I was happy about because I wanted her to find happiness. She used to be super into fitness—she worked out in the gym almost every day, ate healthy, and always encouraged me to stay active too. She took care of herself and had so much discipline when it came to her health.

But ever since she met her current boyfriend (who’s about 340 lbs), she’s completely let go of that lifestyle. She went from around 134 lbs to 280 lbs in just four years, and it’s really noticeable. Her body has changed so much—she used to be fit and strong, but now she moves slower, gets out of breath easily, and even simple things seem to take more effort for her. She doesn’t go to the gym at all anymore, which is shocking because it used to be such a big part of her life.

What worries me the most is that she barely even leaves the couch anymore. She spends most of the day sitting, watching TV, and constantly snacking on junk food. It’s like she’s given up on all the healthy habits she used to love, and I rarely see her eating anything nutritious. She used to be full of energy and always doing something active, but now she just seems exhausted all the time, and I can tell her body is struggling with the extra weight. Even the way she presents herself has changed—she used to put effort into how she looked, but now she just doesn’t seem to care as much.

I know grief affects people in different ways, and maybe this is part of how she’s coping. I don’t want to judge her, but it’s hard to see her change so much. It’s not even just the weight gain that bothers me—it’s how different she is as a person. It’s like she’s completely adapted to her boyfriend’s habits, and I barely recognize the person she used to be.

I don’t know how to bring it up without sounding like an asshole. I love my mom and just want her to be healthy and happy, but I feel like she’s not making the best choices for herself. Has anyone else experienced something like this with a family member? How do you even approach this kind of conversation?

submitted by /u/Wendyhernandez1
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