How do I [21F] learn to do this from a place of love? Asking for advice on developing a healthy, self-respecting mindset.

A little back story, but when I was going through puberty I gained 20 lbs in a year from both growing into a different body and binge eating at night. At 19, I learned how to starve myself to lose weight. I went from 128 lbs to 113 lbs, and then I started binge eating on and off.

Today I'm 123 lbs. I'm 5'1. That puts me at a BMI of 23. If I hovered around the lower 120s forever, I wouldn't have a problem with it, but the problem is that whenever I make an effort to lose weight healthily, my brain encourages me to binge to reward myself after my "hard work" and "suffering." I don't starve myself, by the way. I eat normal, sustainable meals.

I've become very anxious about my weight gain, recently, especially since my body weight goes up to 125 lbs after a binge. It's not so much the fact that I don't like how I look - it's just...the feeling of a loss of self-control I guess? I want to regain control and get back down to a comfortable weight. I really wouldn't mind trying intermittent fasting or OMAD since they make 1200 cals easy to stick to, and I don't like breakfast anyways. Honestly, I've tried both before and they've actually helped get the binging under control, it's just the starting again that's hard. It's the getting into the right frame of mind that's so darn difficult.

I want to lose weight - my goal weight is 115 lbs, and I want to learn how to motivate myself from a place of love. I know routine and discipline are the main things here, but I want to know what kind of mindset you guys have adapted over time to help aide you in your weight loss. Binging is so euphoric, but I think I deserve the mental effort in order to correct my habits.

Thank you! :)

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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/161oogm/how_do_i_21f_learn_to_do_this_from_a_place_of/