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Recovering binge eater/ trying to lose weight

Hi.

I lurk on this page a lot but rarely ever post anything. I find it really helpful to hear advice from real people, with real experiences, on the internet.

I can remember always feeling like I needed to lose weight, since I was probably 12 years old. I was a very active kid, and my household was pretty healthy so my weight was never an issue, but I always thought it was. A little bit later on in my teen years I developed a binge eating disorder, mostly because my dad was so judgmental about food and fitness, that I always gorged on junk alone, in shame. The weight was slowly starting to catch up with me, but when the pandemic hit so did an extra 15 lbs. This was the first time I learned about calories and how weight gain/ loss works, and that it's 80% food and 20% exercise, while my entire life I thought if I was active, it did not matter how I ate. Now, I sit at 165-170 lbs (height 5'5") and want to lose about 30.

When I first started this journey, I was very positive that one day I would accomplish this. Now, every "failed" attempt makes me think a little more that I might never shed the excess weight.

I've begun to really process through my binge eating and it's not nearly as bad as it used to be, but I have this sugar craving that comes and goes. I would love to stop eating sugar for the most part, which seems totally doable after a day of too much sugar and feeling gross, but the next day it's like I don't care.

The only time I saw results in my fitness is when my emotional eating was in check (physical activity was always the easy part for me), I lost 10 lbs and counting before I had an entire onset of conflicts that resurrected my issues.

Sometimes I feel doomed with my stupid eating habits. Any advice? I want to be better but it's so hard. I'm sure someone will be able to relate to this.

Thanks.

submitted by /u/Ok_Illustrator_401
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/119s0t3/recovering_binge_eater_trying_to_lose_weight/

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