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Your experiences building muscle after weight-loss - I'm anxious about eating more

I'm a single kg away from my goal weight. Going from 67 kg to 56 kg (from 147lbs to 123lbs for the Americans), being 160 cm/5'3. I've not been below 60kg/132lbs since high school, so I'm happy with the progress. 55kg has been my goal weight for the last 10 years, as it's right in the dead center of a healthy BMI. My weight loss has not been super healthy however, and lately I've had to admit to myself that I've developed some disordered eating habits that aren't good for me, especially long term. Going to counselling for other things have really made this clear to me.

Despite reaching my goal weight, I'm not happy with my body still. I feel very typically "skinny-fat". I don't have a lot of muscle, and don't think losing more weight will do anything beneficial for my figure. Will probably just lose the curves I have at this point. I'd love to be more lean and firm, but I feel really anxious eating more in order to build muscle. Honestly have anxiety about going back up to maintenance, but that's being worked on.

Right now I've been on around 1200 calories (and often less if I'm being honest) a day since November-ish (actually think it was more to start, but gradually decreased), but I have a "cheat day" every Friday and Saturday where I go up to 1800-2000. When I work out, which I do 4-5 times a week, it's usually running or zumba classes. My maintenance calories should be around 1700-1800 calories I believe.

What are your experiences with eating at maintenance/above in order to gain muscle after weight loss? How many calories did you increase your daily intake by? How did you start? Did lifting lighter weights for more reps do anything for you? Asking because I have mild scoliosis and have been told very specifically I shouldn't be lifting heavily as is.

submitted by /u/spklvr
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/udpvz3/your_experiences_building_muscle_after_weightloss/

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