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Long-term deficit/weight loss effort exacerbating depression?

I've been losing weight, or at least been living with the intent to lose weight for the past 4.5 years now. I've lost ~120lbs, but still haven't reached my goal yet due to lots of fluctuations. I've struggled with binge eating disorder quite a bit which caused many, many stalls in my weight loss progress, but I can honestly say that for the past 4.5 years, I have woken up in the morning with the intent to maintain a caloric deficit on nearly every single day--not to say that I'm proud of it, though.

I'm not planning on quitting now as I am within 10lbs of my goal and I feel more resilient with regard to binging than I have in a long time, plus I just want this shit to be over with--but I can't help but wonder if my mental health issues (pretty volatile) may have been seriously aggravated over the past few years due to the long-term deficit/putting pressure on myself to lose weight for such a long time.

I have no concerns about keeping the weight off once I am done cutting because I began running last fall (which I found out I love) and my mileage is high enough that I can eat quite a lot to maintain, but do you think that I'll feel more peace when I'm no longer focused on weight loss? Curious to hear what your experiences have been like, TIA!

submitted by /u/throwawaylu1998
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/l91sta/longterm_deficitweight_loss_effort_exacerbating/

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