I have watched myself gain weight but have avoided stepping on a scale for almost 3 yrs now. I kept telling myself, oh I'm the heaviest I've ever been but I probably weigh 140-160 As long as I kept avoiding actually confronting myself, I could ignore the reality. And if I would have just stopped and admitted where I was at, that I had a problem, I probably could have made changes allot sooner, changes that where easier. Than it kept going, it became a new set of problems to actively ignore. Ignore the exhaustion, the joint aches, the fact that I dont even fit the baggiest of my cargo pants. I've watched my stretch marks slither and slide over my thighs up to the top of my stomach. I've always had sensitive skin. But it would have been easier to stop sooner. It's been slow, I lost 7lbs in 3 months now . I've railed against the fact that my metabolism is so slow. That thyroid disease runs in my family. it's not fair that I'm smol, that it's not fair that I can't eat the same things that I cook for other people. And I fucking LOVE to cook. But at the end of the day. This is my body and I want to actually live in it. And I DO feel better, bit by bit, even if I have 80lbs to lose even if it means it's a lifestyle that I'm not used too because it's better to live comfortably (psychologically) in reality than it is go live in painful(literally physically) delusion . And I hope this post helps someone to just go look at the fucking scale.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/comments/ijrpvm/i_am_barely_51_and_almost_200lbs/
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